Photo by Alyssa Guiliani
Ellen Gootblatt said the secret to a happy relationship
is accepting your partner for who
she or he is and not trying to change them.
Students get a crash course on the do’s and don’ts of the dating scene by relationship coach Ellen Gootblatt
Relationship coach and expert Ellen Gootblatt spoke to a crowded audience of students, guests and faculty in the Lower Gallery in March. The sassy Brooklyn native lectured candidly on relationships and “Sex, Passion, and Intimacy.”
For Gootblatt, there are ten simple commandments women and men should abide by in their relationships if they want them to be successful and healthy. She started the discussion by stating: “No man, no woman, no job, no family, and no friend are worth any agony.”
“Similar lifetime goals and commitments are necessary, though common interests are not so needed. Relationships should enhance and not diminish each person,” she continued.
Gootblatt went on to explain the “do’s and don’ts” of the dating scene as students laughed and smiled at her witty style.
In her discussion of sex in an adult relationship, she explained that good sex is the ability to surrender completely to your partner.
The key to a happy relationship, Gootblatt shared, is accepting your partner for who she or he truly is and not trying to change that person. However, certain compromises are required.
For the younger students in the audience, Gootblatt recommended waiting for sex until they are absolutely sure it is right for them. Young people need to be mature enough to handle the responsibility of such serious decisions, she said.
Gootblatt encouraged students to build their self-confi dence and always remember that they are worthy people.
“Don’t audition for anybody,” she said. “You are not everybody’s type, but you are somebody’s type.”
Along with her advice, Gootblatt shared many amusing stories from her personal experiences and answered several questions from the audience.
Students were noticeably excited about Gootblatt’s visit to North Lake, and several were eager for some one-on-one counseling.
Gootblatt has been a relationship coach for 17 years.
“I felt I was needed for this profession, and I go where I am needed,” she said.
Gootblatt also was a junior high school teacher for 22 years. She hosted a radio show, WAC Talk. And she is a published author. All of those experiences, she noted, have contributed to her ability to serve as a relationship coach.
“This isn’t a dress rehearsal, this is real life,” she emphasized, “Relationships are meant to be easy. You cannot make something good if there is a bad foundation.”