Finding the light

Dr. Ida Baty of the North Lake College Counseling office has been giving lectures, which is not something she normally does. She’s been teaching students how to breathe. What’s brought her into the classroom though, is not a subject as airy as that. The topic of her lectures is learning how to de-stress. The reason for the topic is suicide.

A few weeks ago, one of our fellow students here at North Lake took his own life. This has prompted a few of the faculty to recruit the assistance of our counseling staff to talk to their students about what has happened, and how to prevent it from happening again.

According to the National Center for Health Statistics, in 2002 people younger than 25 accounted for more than 12 percent of all suicides. It is the third leading cause of death for people between the ages of 15 and 24, and more people die from suicide than from homicide. In 2002, 4,010 young people between the ages of 15 and 24 successfully committed suicide.

They also estimate that for every successful suicide, there are six survivors left in the wake. That means that in 2002, there were at least 24,060 people who were left wondering what they should have done differently. There were 24,060 people left asking themselves if they should have seen the warning signs.

There were 24,060 people who were needlessly blaming themselves for what happened.

Into this darkness is where Dr Baty steps in.

“Some of the students have been saying that they should have seen some sign of their friend being in trouble, or that they saw signs but didn’t know what to do,” she said.

These sentiments are echoed by Dr. Gabriel Bach, a government professor at North Lake, who had this student in one of his classes.

“It was unexpected,” he said. “We’re in disbelief, shock. We were totally unaware. There was no change in his attitude or behavior, whatsoever. He would come to see me regularly, like clockwork, after class to compare notes. I wonder: was it something I said?”

It may be hard for most of us, who have never seriously considered suicide, to really understand what’s going on in the mind of a critically depressed person who sees no hope for a brighter future.

“Someone described it to me like being in a dark room with no windows,” said Dr. Baty.

She suggests that if you are feeling stressed, breathing exercises can help.

“You’ll be surprised what a few good, slow, deep breaths can do,” she explained.

She also suggests reconnecting with nature.

“Go for a walk in the park, or some place that’s away from all of the things in your life that cause you stress. You can’t change the events in your life,” she said, “but you can change your feelings by changing your thoughts.

“We’re all stretched with work, and school, and family situations,” she said. “We’re there to help students when they have trouble dealing with their problems.”

She explained that someone who needs help may not necessarily go looking for it.

“Seeking help does not come from a position of weakness; it comes from a position of strength,” she said. “It’s not easy to say, ‘I need help.’ ”

That’s why she suggests that if you know someone who needs help but doesn’t want to seek counseling alone, you should go with him or her, even sit in on the session if they want you to.

If you feel the need to talk to someone about your feelings on the recent suicide or about a different problem you are having, Dr. Baty strongly encourages you to see a counselor. They are there to help you see the light at the end of the tunnel.

The counseling offi ce is in A-420, and you can call them at 972-273-3135 for an appointment.